If I Knew....

If I knew that I was going to die tomorrow, then what would I do? I asked myself this question. Many do not know beforehand that their time is up in this world. But for those who do, would they dwell on this question, I wondered. So, I asked myself, what would I do, if I knew.

I would go to my dad, give him a hug and tell him that I love him very much. I’ll thank him for looking after me. And ask him to feed me with his own hands, one last time.

I would call my ex-husband and talk to him one last time and wish him all the best in this world and thank him for showing me the light within me, for showing me what a real family is like, for teaching me how to be a good wife, sister, daughter, friend, lover, mother. And for keeping me grounded. I’ll ask him to do the same for his current wife.

I would call my brother and tell him how much he means to me and how grateful I am to have had such a brother.

I would tell my sisters to smile when they remember me and to look after dad and bro.

I would go and sleep in my aunt’s lap just for a while and thank her for being my mum.

I would ask the woman who, though unwillingly, brought me into this world, if she had, even for a moment, felt anything other than hate for me. I would ask her why she hated me, even before she saw me or knew me.

I would thank my neighbours for treating me as an equal member of their family.

I would go through my pictures and tell my children that it won’t be long before I am with them and ask them to forgive me for my sin.

I would thank the man who made me fall in love again in this life. I’ll thank him for teaching me that it is worth my while to look back and wait for that person to catch up to me. That sometimes it is worth giving a person a second chance in life.

I would sit down and re-write my Will again, and make sure that there are no lose ends when I am gone.

I would pray to God Al’Mighty, just one last time, and complete my prayers, instead of hashing through it. God Al’Mighty, have mercy on my soul.

Inna li’Allahi wa inna ilaihi raaji oon – From Allah we come and to Him we shalt return.

J ¡ η η !

21 August 2006, 11:24AM